"In prayer, it is better to have a heart without words than words without a heart"
--- Mahatma Gandhi
I feel like most people have already heard of prayer or know how to pray in one way or another. Not everyone prays the same. Not everyone really needs to pray the same. In fact, it's recommended that our prayers not be cookie-cut copies. But what prayer should be is a meaningful and sincere communication to God. Prayer is powerful! It keeps us in close proximity with God and His angels. It enables us to have a close and personal relationship with Him. Believe what you may, I invite us all to unite in sincere and faith-filled prayer to ask for God's spirit and blessings to be poured upon us more abundantly.
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* Note: This is a continuation of my first experiences as a missionary for the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-Day Saints. At this point, I just said goodbye to my family for two years and am now in class which I will be attending for the next 6 weeks before I go to Mexico. (See "Mission Call --- Reynosa, Mexico")
It was the first day in the MTC --- the Missionary Training Center. The other handful of young new arrivals and I delved right into our first Spanish lessons by doing a simple yet brief get-to-know-you exercise with each other. In the first hour of our arrival, we also learned the bare bones on how to pray in Spanish, a roadmap as it were of a couple of simple phrases and such. I'd had 3 years of Spanish classes under my belt, which is more than any of the other guys had, but this was my first time trying to speak off the cuffs and from the heart so I had the fluency of a newborn (See "Trainee to Trainer"). And when you're a missionary, you are praying constantly so learning how to pray in Spanish was a useful first skill to develop. In the MTC, we had plenty of opportunities to practice. For example, we would pray before and after class. But I was a bit startled when before leaving for lunch after just an hour of being there, our instructor, Hermano Pitcher, asked if I’d offer the first prayer in Spanish! We knelt together in a circle, and I prayed, knowing that we wouldn't judge each other because we were all learning together. I had to peak at the phrases on the whiteboard, but I offered a short and simple prayer in Spanish. That was the first of thousands of additional prayers I'd say in Spanish over the years. There's a first for everything. And by small and simple things great things come to pass. It's not the words that make the prayer, it's the intent.
OUR RELATIONSHIP TO GOD & WITH GOD
Prayer is how we communicate with God. What do we in the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-Day Saints consider our relationship with God to be? We consider Him to be our Heavenly Father, and that every person on Earth is literally a beloved son or daughter of God. Jesus Christ is our Savior, another child of God, but the only Begotten of the Father instead of an Earthly Father. He further distinguished himself from all other children of God by living in perfect obedience to God the Father, never sinning, and performing a perfect sacrifice on behalf of all mankind which we call "The Atonement" (See "Christ's Ministry", "Great Sacrifice", and "Obedience: A Sign of Love"). God and Jesus Christ are two different physical beings, but symbolically united as one in purpose (John 12:27-30; see also "A Still, Small Voice"). Jesus Christ prayed often to Heavenly Father and taught us to do likewise. So when we pray, we pray only to Heavenly Father, but in the name of Jesus Christ (3 Nephi 18:19). We recognize that it is only through Jesus Christ that we can return to the presence of God and thus we say that He is our "advocate" with the Father. (1 John 2:2; Moroni 7:8; see also "More Than Good")
HOW TO PRAY
Prayer is not unique to our religion but when we pray, we pray from the heart. We don’t memorize or recite prayers; rather, we use our own words to openly express whatever's on our hearts and minds. In this way, we can best nurture and personalize our relationship with Heavenly Father as we talk to him like a friend, or better yet, family.
Sometimes we pray alone. Other times, we might pray with others. Sometimes we pray aloud, Sometimes, we may choose to pray silently in our hearts. We can pray at any time, in any place, and for anything. Prayers are meant to be more habitual than rare. Prayers may be short or long or anything in between. Really, prayer is limitless. And the more we pray, the better.
But let me walk you through the typical way that we pray in case you're curious. Because personal prayers have no limits, let me describe what you would expect to see if you were to participate in prayer with someone from our Church.
We would begin by closing our eyes. This we do so we can focus on listening and otherwise eliminate distractions and concentrate. As our eyes are closed, we might imagine ourselves in God's presence and speaking to Him as if He were next to us.
Generally, orientation doesn’t matter. You can be standing, sitting, lying down, or so forth. As missionaries, we preferred to kneel when praying. As for what our arms are doing, most people keep their arms crossed. Otherwise, they're in some natural relaxed position. We don't need to use them for anything.
Who does the talking? When we're praying with others, one person prays on behalf of the group. Everyone else simply listens silently. In a way, I guess you might look at it as everyone is praying silently in their hearts too. When praying with others, we might take advantage of the opportunity to ask God to bless everyone in the group generally, such as "please bless us all with good health". We would normally reserve asking for blessings for ourselves in our personal prayers.
Our prayers are more often than not gentle rather than loud or boisterous, so when the scriptures say to pray "with all the energy of heart" (Moroni 7:48), that really means that your heart is focused on God. Keeping the volume down doesn't mean you love God any less. Don't underestimate the power of peace and quiet, what we often call "reverence" to invite the spirit of God.
When praying, we strive for respectful and reverent language. You'll find that members of the Church often say "Thee" and "Thy" instead of "You" and "Your" when addressing God in prayer. This is particularly common when praying together, but feel free to speak however you want in your personal prayers.
As mentioned, prayers are not memorized or recited. That doesn't mean that we can't repeat things every now and then, but they should be sincere not simply "saying words to say words". But this is the general blueprint that we go by. First, we always start by addressing God. A common example is to say something like, “Dear Heavenly Father”. Next comes the content of the prayer which is completely up to you. For example, we might choose to express thanks to God. For example, "We thank thee for our families". Next, we don't have to ask for anything, but there's nothing wrong with asking for blessings (for yourself or others). The scriptures invite us to ask for God's blessings, "Ask, and it shall be given you; seek, and ye shall find; knock, and it shall be opened unto you" (Matt. 7:7; see also "It Shall Be Opened"). I usually ask for help in school or work or for peace and understanding, or even for forgiveness; an example might be "Please bless us with thy Spirit" or "Please bless us to sleep well tonight". In prayer, we can also ask God questions. Answers come in a variety of ways, but common responses may come in the form of the Still, Small Voice of the Holy Ghost, bringing us increased understanding, peace, and reassurance. And at the end, the person saying the prayer always says, “In the name of Jesus Christ, amen”. Once they say "Amen", everyone else then says “amen” together (which is an expression of agreement meaning “so be it”). And that's it
VAIN REPETITIONS
Many of you are familiar with what is commonly known as "The Lord's Prayer" which begins with "Our Father which art in heaven, hallowed be thy name" (Matt. 6:9-13). This was part of Jesus' "Sermon on the Mount" when He admonished the people to pray. Just as I did in the section above, He gave them this general blueprint as an example of who to pray to, how to pray, and what they might choose to pray for. As beautiful as it is, many people mistakenly believe that "The Lord's Prayer" is something He wanted us to repeat word for word, but this isn't true. He warned against vain repetitions. He wanted our prayers to be sincere and personal, even an intimate and sacred conversation with God, just as Jesus' prayers with God the Father always were. He did this to contrast with those who prayed for attention or for self-righteous reasons:
"And when thou prayest, thou shalt not be as the hypocrites are: for they love to pray standing in the synagogues and in the corners of the streets, that they may be seen of men. Verily I say unto you, They have their reward.
But when ye pray, use not vain repetitions, as the heathen do: for they think that they shall be heard for their much speaking." (Matt. 6:5-7)
We should pray with real intent of heart, or in other words, "sincerity" (Moroni 7:9; see also "Turn the Other Cheek"). We must be careful to avoid "vain repetitions" when we pray (Matt. 6:7) which means to repeat something often simply out of routine without really meaning it. Repetition itself isn't bad only unless it is hollow and insincere.
WHEN OUR PRAYERS SEEM UNANSWERED
Sometimes our prayers are not answered as we hope or expect but we cannot force God to do anything. Nevertheless, He does love us and does want the best for us. We are His children! The whole world was created just for us! (See "The Plan of Happiness and Salvation"). But life wasn't meant to be easy. We knew that life was going to have its trials, and it's precisely for that reason that Jesus Christ was prepared to be our Savior and Redeemer from before the world was! (See "The Return of the King -- Part 1"). I don't have all the reasons for why some difficulties befall us from time to time, but in my experience, they always seem like opportunities to either turn outward and grow closer together or to abandon hope and withdraw ourselves (See "Knowest Thou the Condescension of God?"). The choice is ours. If we react well, our hardships can be for our good. Trust in the Lord's Ways, Him who has everything planned. (See "5th Area: The Lord's High Ways")
It has been my experience that faith isn't faith until it's tried (See "Become As Little Children"). It's easy to have faith when things are easy. But some blessings and answers don't come until the next life. Nevertheless, the greatest of God's blessings will come eventually to all who are faithful. And faith in Jesus Christ includes faith in His timing. (See "Administering to the Sick and Afflicted" and "Patriarchs and Potters")
WORD AND DEED
Oftentimes, prayers are answered after action on our part. As reliant as we are upon God, we shouldn't expect God to do everything for us. We cannot expect to get anything done by sitting on the couch and eating potato chips all day. Heavenly Father expects us to be proactive. (See "Choices")
"The Messiah cometh in the fulness of time, that he may redeem the children of men from the fall. And because that they are redeemed from the fall they have become free forever, knowing good from evil; to act for themselves and not to be acted upon..." (2 Nephi 2:26)
Often, we will be the answer to other peoples’ prayers. God expects us to help one another. That's why we must "Walk the Walk" as well as "Talk the Talk". Truth be told, there are endless opportunities to help others. (See "Called to Serve")
EVERYONE CAN AND SHOULD PRAY!
There are no requirements to pray. Anyone can and should pray. It’s a commandment. Personal, private prayer is an essential part of our spiritual development (Matt. 6:6). However; we should make an effort to pray vocally when appropriate too.
Heavenly Father knows our hearts but we can only get to know Him as we include Him in all we do. He listens. He is actively interested in our lives. He wants to be involved.
Prayer also gives us strength. Being mindful of Heavenly Father in our lives helps us overcome temptation and inspires us to be our best. We should never give in to the idea that we are not worthy to pray; this idea comes from the devil who doesn't want us to speak with God (2 Nephi 32:8; see also "You Will be Free"). Everyone can and should pray. Old and young. Male and female. Everyone.
START WHERE YOU ARE
Most of our prayers were repetitious in the MTC since our Spanish vocabulary was very limited. For example, “Dear Heavenly Father, please bless us with the Gift of Tongues and with the spirit. Bless my companion. Help us learn. In the name of Jesus Christ, amen”. And that's all it takes. You're not giving an eloquent presentation. You're just having a simple conversation with God. Simple prayers can be some of the most beautiful. Even children can pray. In fact, I hope we do teach our children to pray.
Missionaries always begin and end appointments with prayer --- two prayers in total. Either I or my companion always offered ourselves to give the first one since many people we taught weren't always comfortable or in the habit of praying. But we'd warn them up front that after our appointment, we'd be asking them to offer the second one before we left. Many people were hesitant for any number of reasons. We'd often hear something along the lines of, "You do it. You speak better than I do", to which I would struggle to keep my eyes from rolling as I thought about my first simple prayers in broken Spanish. It's not that the Mexican people couldn't speak Spanish, because that doesn't make sense, rather what they were trying to say was something else. I suspect it was some sort of fear that we'd judge them. Or sometimes, they just didn't like praying in general. We'd walk them through how we prayed and then we'd encourage them to pray in whatever way they felt comfortable. Sometimes they came around. Other times, there were long awkward moments of silence as they presumably prayed in their heart rather than out loud. Sometimes, they'd insist on repeating everything we said which was awkward too as it felt like they were talking over us mid-sentence. Everyone prays differently, but what I hope we come to appreciate is that prayer should be personal, not something that we need to memorize or recite or feel like there's only one right way to do it.
I can't remember who taught me, but he made a game out of getting someone to volunteer for the prayer. This wasn't a particularly effective method, yet it worked a handful of times under the right circumstances. The guy who invented it was cheeky and had an infectiously energetic and bubbly personality so he created it more as something to break the tension and to have a laugh rather than coerce someone into praying. There were two variations to the "game" --- the "Juego de cuerpos de agua" or the "Juego de minerales", which means the "Body of Water Game "and the "Mineral Game". People would look at him with confusion but intrigue when he introduced the game. He'd explain the "game" as such: Each person takes turns saying, "Yo" and then names either a body of water or a mineral (Yo means "I" which at first glance doesn't make sense). The person who can't think of one that hasn't already been said is told that they'd say the prayer. But actually, whenever he heard, "Yo Lago" (which nonsensically means "I lake"), he'd abruptly say "Thank You", close his eyes and act like they'd just volunteered to pray. The joke is that in Spanish "Yo Lago" sounds like "Yo la hago" which means, "I'll do it". He'd do the same thing if someone said: "Yo oro" which has a double meaning. It can be translated as "I gold" but can also mean "I pray". It was all harmless fun and only worked with people who'd never heard it before. But in general, the best thing to do was to just be forward and politely ask people to pray.
Even though it's been years since my first prayer in Spanish at the MTC, and have since offered thousands of thousands more, I still enjoy having personal prayers in Spanish. It's good language practice. And it reminds me of the many people I prayed with in Mexico --- people of all ages from all walks of life who offered all kinds of prayers. And what a beautiful thing it is to hear others pray for you and you pray for them. I truly believe that the world would be a better place with more prayer, people cherishing that communication and personal relationship with Heavenly Father, and petitioning Him to bless not just ourselves, but others as well.
Ponder Question: How can you make your prayers more meaningful? Are your prayers sincere, or simply routine? Think of someone in need, and pray for them.
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